Dr. Ku Advice

[Original Raccoon]

No no. I just checked. My dad is very hairy.

 

[Maverick]

Well it happeneds Racoon. Did you overheard about girls who had a delayed menstruation? It's similar to your case but I think if you wait a little bit longer things might start to come out. You'll see. And where the hell is Dr. Ku when you need him? Is he sick?

 

[TrongaMonga]

Originally posted by Raccoon
No no. I just checked. My dad is very hairy.

You sure that's your dad?

 

[Amantis]

I wanna be more corrupted. Is there a way to go about that?

- Amantis

 

[Kamikaze]

sure, come over to my place around 9pm.
p.s. wear something easy to take off

 

[Amantis]

Yeah, I may come, but taking things off? Uh...no...

Not one piece.

I'll be wearing a piece of armour called the 'chastity belt'.

- Amantis

 

[Kamikaze]

whatever you want to wear is fine. even if it is just a chastity belt and no top
do you need directions?

 

[Kaldaris]

Dr.Ku, My eyes are slowly deterierating, and my head is balding, also, my alternate personalities are conflicting with each other, Kaldaris wants to kill Gilgamesh, Paradox feels like destroying Kaldaris, and Gilgamesh wants to stab the bloody hell out of Paradox. Help me!

 

[Amantis]

You know very well that I need directions.

Did I mention that the function of the chastity belt includes protection from other people's skin and eyeballs too?

- Amantis

 

[l33t 0n3]

Kami, heres a 10,000 degree (ferinheit) stick of metal that magically cannot melt(itself), im sure it can get through that chastity belt in notime

 

[l33t 0n3]

Dear Dr. Ku,

Whenever I drink a gallon of 20% nitro gas, and then spray a can of WD40 while burping, it acts as a flamethrower then it explodes. I have no hands right now, and one leg! I dont want to lose the last leg! Please help!

-Sackless Moron (aka boomstick)

 

[Kamikaze]

Originally posted by Amantis
You know very well that I need directions.

really, even after all the times you slept over?

p.s. this has nothing to with anything but, i'm a professional rubix cube champion:wasted

 

[l33t 0n3]

oh damn my stick went boom again!

 

[Amantis]

I thought that you knew that I can be rather forgetful at times, considering the fact that there are other members to visit...

- Amantis

 

[Hot Action Cop]

Originally posted by TrongaMonga
Dr. Ku, why do you have a name that in my language seems Cu, which means ass?

Are you Dr. Ass then?

Yes. Next question.

Originally posted by Pan
I, i mean my umm Friend has this thing happening, where his skin is turning red when he is all horney nad stuff and the girls just point and laugh at me, umm i mean him. what should he do?

Stop eating that month old chinese food. Next question

Originally posted by Pan
I, i mean my umm Friend has this thing happening, where his skin is turning red when he is all horney nad stuff and the girls just point and laugh at me, umm i mean him. what should he do?

Originally posted by KittyKittie
I have 2 male cats under our windows and doors, trying to call my female cat out. What do I do to make them leave? Other than neutering my poor little kitty?

Well you can try this. Get some dog piss or mountain lion piss and put it around your yard. They sell them in little bottles and they quirt out easily... and spray it around your yard. The scent should scare away those pesky viagra using cats. Seriously though it does work.

Next question

Originally posted by Raccoon
Dear Dr. Ku

Could you please tell me when I will begin going through puberty? It has been a long 15 years and I am tired of waiting. Everyone laughs at me because of my high voice... it really hurts my feelings. Can you recommend a shot or something that can speed up the process... or maybe a lotion that I can rub on myself to get more hair. Anything you could say would be of great importance.

- Mr. Squeeky Hairless

There is no real prescription drug that you can use to change your voice or speed up puberty. You can however become more active and get involved in sports. Or hang out with really ugly bald kids and look better by comparison. As for the hair, just splash a little rogain on here and there. As for hormone pills, they have very nasty side effects that can result in penis shrinking. Dont take em.

Next Question

Originally posted by TorridMind
Dear Dr. Ku
this forum has been taking up so much of my ****ing time I have no time to play Diablo. What should I do?
Another problem im having is whippy wont stop mentioning drugs whenever he’s around me and I want him to die... how should I get this done? It needs to be slow and painful
Yours truly
Sleepless in... uhhh... Vegas.

Call 1-800-spankme for that last question and say Ku sent ya. Discount. As for the first one... everyday take a little bit of time out of your forum going and play diablo. Gradually increase it daily. Also, you can put a note by your computer saying remember: Diablo first, forums later.

Next question.

Originally posted by Amantis
I wanna be more corrupted. Is there a way to go about that?

- Amantis

Get a gene transplat with cort. You know, swap a few dna strings.

Next question.

Originally posted by Gilg-err Kalda- i mean Paradox
Dr.Ku, My eyes are slowly deterierating, and my head is balding, also, my alternate personalities are conflicting with each other, Kaldaris wants to kill Gilgamesh, Paradox feels like destroying Kaldaris, and Gilgamesh wants to stab the bloody hell out of Paradox. Help me!

Well, um... you can lock paradox and gilgamesh up in a cage. When they want to come out scream BOY DONT MAKE ME GET THE HOSE. It works for me. No it doesnt. Yea it does. NO IT DOESNT! Yeah it does BOY DONT MAKE ME GET THE HOSE! Sorry sorry!

Next question.

Originally posted by 1337-0n3
Dear Dr. Ku,

Whenever I drink a gallon of 20% nitro gas, and then spray a can of WD40 while burping, it acts as a flamethrower then it explodes. I have no hands right now, and one leg! I dont want to lose the last leg! Please help!

-Sackless Moron (aka boomstick)

Stop being a ****in moron and throw out your gas and wd40.

next question



Thats all for today. Sorry about the wait. I was sick.

~Dr. Ku~

 

[Kitty]

Hey!!! What about the question I asked?

 

[Hot Action Cop]

its the 3rd one...

Well you can try this. Get some dog piss or mountain lion piss and put it around your yard. They sell them in little bottles and they quirt out easily... and spray it around your yard. The scent should scare away those pesky viagra using cats. Seriously though it does work.

wat i wrote.

 

[Original Raccoon]

Well Done Dr. Ku...

______________________________

Dear Dr. Ku

I recently spontaniously combusted. Luckily, there was a bottle of WD40 nearby and I was able to put it out. What would be the best way to begin healing?

 

[Kaldaris]

Dr. Ku, you've really NOT helped me, Kaldaris keeps trying to kill Gilgamesh while attempting to put him in the cage!!

 

[Zaku]

Dear Dr. Ku,

I got Drafted into the US army, i also weight 599 pounds. Should I go or run off into Canada like a pussy and smoke some pot?