Starcraft story (help me out a lil)

[shrimpshark]

supersmaches wins.

 

[SmashBros.Pro]

lol

You must have been typing at the same time I was shrimp

 

[shrimpshark]

Lol thats ironic.

 

[coRtALoS]

Version Confusion

I like how Fade's ended, leaves a possibility of an ally they didn't expect that could save their asses later on. I'm gonna vote to go with SmashBros.Pro's version.

I actually caught myself smiling, and getting that "Fucl<ing Hell Yeah" feeling of excitement while I was reading it. The kind you get when you're playing an RPG game, and you get the nastiest character in your party, or that feeling you got when you saw that huge gun rack zoom in at Neo for the first time and you thought to yourself "Holy $hit". I'd add more, but I have a class in 20 mins...

 

[shrimpshark]

cont.

Well we didn't know the carrier was on a mission of peace, said Fade slightly giggling.
Zaren looked frightingly weird that day for some reason he wouldn't talk to anyone.
Late that night Fade got a hint of what was wrong with him Ray hadn't been seen for two days,and Fade hadn't even noticed.
Early the next morning Fade awoke to find a mess people where everywhere and he didn't recignize them so he,asked can I help you with anything?
The people seemed to ignore him so he headed off to the bridge.
When he arrived at the comand center he was astonished to see zertual in a cage then he started to laugh.

 

[SmashBros.Pro]

Ummmm.....

How can he leave later on? Remember I said that he had to stay on board the Norad until they had gas for the Wraith?
And how would they get the gas?
And Zertual will not be leaving the story anytime soon. Hes gonna play a roll as main charecter until later on.

 

[shrimpshark]

There I edited it.

 

[SmashBros.Pro]

Where does the bridge come from?
I'm sorry but, I can't follow your part so I'll just continue from where I left off.

 

[shrimpshark]

The bridge is the control center ill edit it agian.

 

[coRtALoS]

damnit... the confusion begins again

lol, I told you

 

[SmashBros.Pro]

Continued from my last post...

For seven weeks nothing special happened. All was good aboard the Norad until a loud siren went off scaring the hell out of everyone on the ship. Everyone rushed to the front of the ship, even Zertual, to see what the hell was going on.
"Well boys" said the pilot, "Guess where we are." Excitement was in everyones eyes when they relized that the long and boring travel was finally over. "Now don't rush off the ship when we land" said Zaren, "Await for each of your orders." But of course everyone rushed to get out of the Norad IV.
Everyone was shocked to see how much the new planet differed from Earth I and II. What appeared to stretch into the clouds and they felt like they were petrified were what looked like Earth trees. Water looked normal enough, but the taste was actually very refreshing. The planet had grass like Earth and the sky was blue. Even the air was breathable according to Zertual.
"Now that everyone is here I would like you to start on each of your tasks." said Zaren, "Fade, Robert, Sarah, Kody, Klyde, Jack, and Micheal you have the day off. Ray I need you to construct some Barracks and Hayne and Guy I would like you to start scouting a location for the Command Center."

 

[coRtALoS]

Shrimpshark

To be completely honest man, I really don't understand any of the RPG stories you post. I think you need to read what you write before you post it. I've been PMing SmashBros.Pro my ideas so they won't conflict with his, however you're just off in your little world man. I hate to sound like such an arrogant, self-centered fucl<, but maybe you should keep going on the other one you and I were doing and leave this one be?

I'll work on that one with you again if you want.

 

[SmashBros.Pro]

Yeah

I can't follow where your going at all. I think from what you posted they have already landed? You didn't decribe the planet at all and wtf is up with Zertual being in a cage?

Sorry dude, but either you gonna have to PM what you want to post first or just leave it as it is.

 

[coRtALoS]

The Stormclouds Gather...

"I sense something, almost familiar, though this planet was never charted by my people to my knowledge" said Zeratul. He had been staring up at the clouds, revelling in life which flourished on this untapped planet. "So much life here, it's almost a shame it's going to lose it's beauty."

"Zeratul, I fully agree with you" said Zaran, "However my people need this planet if we are to survive. Perhaps through the development of Terran technology, we may one day learn to restore that which has been lost in this universe. But in honor of our new friendship, I would like you to name this new planet Zeratul."

"I am honored to have such an honor Zaran. We shall call this planet Oraius, which means 'Bringers of Hope' in my language." pulling a small Protoss data disk out of his pocket, Zeratul continued, "I have something that may come in use for you. My ship was on a course to deliver some cutting edge technology plans for a new Protoss weapon, in experimental stages. It's codenamed 'Project Cleansing'. It was initiated by the late Tassadar of the Templar. The weapon, in it's final stages, would allow Protoss Observers to direct Psionic energy, channeled through a Protoss Nexus, which would replicate the effects of a Yomato Gun. However the damage would be directed at multiple targets, and much weaker."

"You're just giving this to us?"

"I believe that through Protoss/Terran hybrid technology, the war with the Zerg may soon come to an end."

"Klyde" shouted Zaran

"Sir?" replied Klyde from a work bench where he was studying the innerworkings of an Arclyte Shock Cannon, not yet attached to anything.

"I want you to take these designs and see what you can make of it."

"Yes sir." said Klyde, excited he had a new toy...

 

[SmashBros.Pro]

Four hours later all was going according to plans. Ray established a Command Center and surprised us by making two Barracks over night, he even managed to get a Refinery half built.
"Ray" said Zaren, "You are no doubth the best SCV pilot ever known"
"Thank you sir" Ray said, "But you should really thank Fade for making me realize the importance of my job."
"Well" said Zaren, "Finish up the Refinery and I will give you some time to off"
"Yes Sir" Shouted Ray, as he hurried to finish his job.
Zaren then climbed aboard the Norad to use the transmitter to inform President Aron that they have succsessfully landed and started an outpost.
"Mister Aron Sir" said Zaren, "We have made a succsessful landing and we would now like you to start sending us our reinforcements now"
"Okay" said Aron, "And I hope you do realize that you and that crew will be forever remembered for saving the human race."
"Yes Sir" said Zaren "And I would always be happy to-"
Suddenly the transmitter went dead and a loud screem came from the c0ckpit. Zaren rushed into the c0ckpit to see what the noise was and there he found what seemed to be remains of a human. It was horribly torn into pieces and shredded, blood was all over the wall and limbs were at least five feet apart from each other. Then Fade and Zertual walked in...

 

[coRtALoS]

Hope becomes a memory...

Blood stained Zaran's hands as he nearly collapsed to the ground. Bracing to a panel on the wall, the blood droplets, still fresh, began trickling down his arm. "This used to be Kody. That's the necklace his girlfriend gave him before he went on this mission. Someone get Michael, he needs to be told."

"It is as I feared" said Zeratul inspecting the gore. "This is how I dreamed it would happen."

"Dreamed what?" said Fade, turning to look away from the horrible scene.

"This slaughter. Last night I dreamt of an abomination to the Protoss race... a hybrid that could only be created through the twisted wiles of the Swarm. A Protoss/Zerg hybrid able to wield the psionic energies of Protoss Templars, with the stealth and speed of any other Zerg species. This entire area still emenates psionic energies only learned through embracing the Khala... however everything about it is tainted, as if on purpose."

As Zeratul finished speaking, a small squadron of 10 Marines began to approach the Norad.

"Private First Class Doran Brose at your service sir." said the squad leader. "We heard the scream and have snipers positioned in the surrounding area, however they haven't reported anything."

"Oh Jesus" "Oh fucl< no" "Who fucl<ing did this?!" could be heard in the distance. Kody's brother Michael had just been told what had transpired.

"Your snipers won't be any good here Private." said Zeratul, a solomn look sweeping across his weathered face. "Whatever it was that killed this man can cloak"...

 

[Silent_Assassin]

HAHA

 

[shrimpshark]

Edited

 

[coRtALoS]

I refuse to stop posting in this now =)

"There. That's the last vulture Ion upgrade" yelled Michael over the mechanical hum of the other nearby machinery.

The past two weeks had been hard on him, and though he tried not to show it, Michael was deeply emotionally unbalanced. His work as of late on the outpost's vehicles hadn't been up to his usual standard. Loose screws would cause wheels to come off, or spider mines would detonate before burrowing. He had been the cause of the death of 18 Marines from such incidents.

However Michael had been determined in continuing his job. He believed every vehicle he built would bring the death of his brother's assassin he craved so dearly. A special mechanical group had been assembled to inspect his work, however, as he refused to take a day off.

"I gotta take a piss or my bladder's going to explode" he said to one of the mechanical team workers as he headed for the nearby forest.

Large white puffy clouds dotted the deep blue canvas sky, and a cool breeze sent a slight chill over his face. Michael spent so much time in deep thought, he would often awaken from it not knowing where he was. Snapping to, he realized he had wandered for over a mile into the forest, daydreaming. As he headed back he heard the snap of a branch.

"Probably just an animal" he said shrugging off the sudden twang of fear accompanied with the broken branch. Then he heard the flapping of a cape as the wind around him picked up. Turning around, he thought he saw what looked like tattered Protoss robes flutter behind a tree and vanish. Michael immediately broke into a sprint headed for the camp. Another branch snapped, a lot bigger this time. Michael was breathing so hard he began to get pains in his chest. The sharp piercing feeling as he breathed in, and worse when he exhaled. "It's not raining" he thought as he felt moisture pouring down on his hands, looking down he gasped.

A dagger of a design he had never seen before lay buried in his now bloodsoaked chest. The hilt was of Onyx black gems with a golden silk rope going up the spiral of the design. The blade, which seemed to glow dim blue-grey absorbed most of the blood it touched, as if a dry sponge. As his body began to feel heavier and his chest began to quiver, he collapsed. His head was pounding with the constant *thump* of his pulse, and he lay in a own pool of his own vomit for a moment before he came to grips with what was actually happening.

"Brother, I have failed you" he gasped as a red and black blade of energy severed his head from his neck.

Minutes later the sweet song of birds could be heard above the gentle hum of the crickets as the sun began to set, casting a bright magenta streak across the magnificent sky. Squirrels continued to gather food for the upcoming winter, and a honey-bee became stuck to a red liquid on the rustled leaves, once the blood of a man never to be seen again, now mistaken as a small blotch of wildberry juice.

 

[SmashBros.Pro]

A New Ally, A New Hope

Nobody noticed that Micheal was gone until about an estimated week after he left and everyone figured that he committed suicide because of the extreme pain he was going through knowing his own brother had been brutally murdered.
"I'm going out to look for Micheal" said Fade, "He might have gotten lo-" Zaren interupted and said, "Theres no use, He probaly killed himself, but if you'r still going to look for him at least get some water for the soldiers, they are pretty much dehydrating." Fade turned and walked off.

As Fade walked through the forest he stopped to get a drink of water. Then when he got up from the dirt he heard the sound of twigs and dead leaves cracking. He turned and looked, but all he seen was his shadow. Then the sound was heard again and it felt as if it was getting closer. Then he heard it one more time and shouted "Come out and show yourself, If you plan on killing me at least show me what you are!" Nothing was said.
Fade felt as if his life was over. Then out of nowhere a large dragon came out of the water, it was a light blue color with a someone on his back. The beast reached over Fade and bit a huge chunk out of the ground, then it went back under water. Fade fell to the dirt almost with tears in his eyes. His heart was pounding so hard that it hurt him.
"You on the ground!" said a voice from behind him, "Are you okay?" Fade turned and looked. He seen a greenish-blue figure that was similiar to a Protoss Zealot. Fade replied, "What the hell just happened here!?" then it said, "First off my name is Array and that dragon beast you saw was a Bluewhisp Hydra and second of all that thing that was chasing you was a Infested Dark Templar." "So you saved?" replied Fade. Array nodded and said, "Yes, I did"...