Your Best Lines to get Laid

[coRtALoS]

My friend and I have an ongoing joke about these really corny lines we'd use on women if they had a really good sense of humor. Like lying down on the bed in nothing but your sox and some really tacky boxers and saying "Sex me!".

Whether it's a joke, or just something so stupid it's ****ing hilarious, post the best you can think of.

Another of our *inside* jokes would be, "Why don't you come over here and sit on my anus destroying bonerific erection monster?"

 

[Gedrin]

What do you say we make like two bacteria and conjugate.

Hey baby how bout you and me base pair.

One of my favorites. Might only work on a molecular biologist, but whatever gets you laid.

 

[Forbidden~Paradise]

Lets play army i lay down and you blow the **** outta me

 

[IDefy]

you and me baby aren't nothin but mammals so lets do it like they do on the discovery channel

 

[VegetaClam]

Ha Bitch your not call'n the cops this time, I already cut the phone lines.. Now get undressed before i use this pig Sticker on ya.

-Vegeta Clam

 

[AzNsUpA-Boi]

pig sticker???

i have the f the c the k now all i need is U

 

[B)ushid(o]

"I have 5 grand... wanna fcuk now or later?"

 

[t.A.T.u97]

Whip it out and get it over with, I got a dentist appointment at six.

 

[Gedrin]

he messed it up.

i have the f the c the k now all i need is U

If memory serves me correct it goes this way.

KFC the only thing missing is U.

 

[AxL]

Originally posted by coRtALoS
My friend and I have an ongoing joke about these really corny lines we'd use on women if they had a really good sense of humor. Like lying down on the bed in nothing but your sox and some really tacky boxers and saying "Sex me!".

Whether it's a joke, or just something so stupid it's ****ing hilarious, post the best you can think of.

Another of our *inside* jokes would be, "Why don't you come over here and sit on my anus destroying bonerific erection monster?"

How can you have a best if you never have been laid? ZING!

 

[l33t 0n3]

Originally posted by Gedrin
he messed it up.



If memory serves me correct it goes this way.

KFC the only thing missing is U.

its from a Manson song, I believe... Im listening to it right now. it goes:

I got an F and a C, and I've got a K, too, and the only thing i'm missing is a bitch like you!


*edit*
Cortalos has been laid... obviously you havent been here long, since he posted some time back about his gf's dad finding one of their condoms...

 

[AxL]

Originally posted by l33t 0n3


*edit*
Cortalos has been laid... obviously you havent been here long, since he posted some time back about his gf's dad finding one of their condoms...

The post was made on sarcasm fool. I know about Sara (well a little to much .) Guess I will add a tounge face.

 

[TweaK]

Hey lady, do you know how to have sex?
Yea?
Wanna teach me?

 

[t.A.T.u97]

Originally posted by l33t 0n3
*edit*
Cortalos has been laid... obviously you havent been here long, since he posted some time back about his gf's dad finding one of their condoms...

*Shivers* Isn't that just wonderful?

Anyways, the whole laying on the bed thing or w/e is kinda "out there," even for me ~~

I'd stick with buying a whore/hooker. Its alot easier and no commetment involed and plus you send a happy girl home with a smile on her face and an STD in her pants.

 

[Kamikaze]

do you sleep on your stomach?
can i?

 

[Speedy]

Originally posted by VegetaClam
Ha Bitch your not call'n the cops this time, I already cut the phone lines.. Now get undressed before i use this pig Sticker on ya.

-Vegeta Clam

ROFL

'Hey baby, who bout you come over here and sit on my lap. We can talk about the first thing that pops up'

 

[Misterwhippy]

Me: I'm bored
Girl: yeah, me too
Me: Want to have sex?
Girl: yes, but will it be okay if my hot girlfriend comes too?

Works every time...

 

[AzNsUpA-Boi]

lol.... shouldn't the girl say... can my best friend join us???

 

[DigitalElite]

Originally posted by t.a.t.u97
Whip it out and get it over with, I got a dentist appointment at six.

Hehe comin from a girl, you know itll work.

"Nice shoes, wanna F*ck

 

[t.A.T.u97]

Thats what makes it all the better

You guys are so easy

Other women are flattered by flowers or taken out to dinner makes em feel special but when we get right down to it, all of this if to get in her pants, and ya'll know it!