Heres one....(create a special flame muchy thread in the asylum if youve heard this one)
So a guy dies and goes to hell. Now, hes pretty bummed out, seeing as how hes in hell and all, and the devil sees this, so he walks over and starts talking to the guy:
Devil-Hey man, why are you looking so down? Hell's not that bad a place really, hey, you like drinking?
Guy- Yeah....i guess so...
Devil- Great! Monday's our drinking day!
Guy- wow.....thats pretty cool
Devil- You like drugs?
Guy- Yeah, i like drugs...
Devil_ well, you're in luck! Tuesdays we just hang around and do drugs all day!
Guy- Wow! This is sounding better and better!
Devil- You like Guns?
Guy- Hell yeah!
Devil- Awesome! Wednesday we just hang around and shoot at stuff all day!
Guy- Alright!! This is awesome!
Devil- You like lookin at porno?
Guy- DO I!!! wow!!
Devil- yup, thursday's our porno day!!!
Guy- Damn i think im gonna like it here!
Devil- Thats fuking right !!! Hey, you gay?
Guy- No.
Devil- Oh.........shit.......you're gonna hate fridays then....